Thursday, February 2, 2012

Benson's Story (Part 3)

So, Benson was born at 9:03 AM Las Vegas time.  We were so ecstatic to meet him, but according to the birth plan we had to wait until Sierra was okay with us coming to the hospital.  Of course we were okay with that, but it was so hard to know that our baby was in the hospital, born, alive and we were in a totally different place.  We were told we could come meet him at 4pm that day.  Talk about nerve-racking.  We spent the day with Sierras little sisters.  We met up with Kimmie and her two boys at McDonald's trying to waste the day away at the play-place.  We were texting and talking to family through the day, sharing the big news.  We had so many people that were so excited to meet him.  We were at the hospital by 3:40 buying Sierra some pink roses and just anxiously awaiting the big moment.  We met up with Judy in the hospital lobby and rode up with her. Because Sierras little sisters weren't allowed to come meet Benson, Sierra and her mom met us in the lobby of their floor.  We gave her the flowers, hugged, talked for a few minutes and then Judy walked Ben and I back to meet him.  Talk about anticipation.  He was in the NICU so there was a fear that we would only be able to go in one at a time, but the nurses were extra nice and allowed us in together.  I am so glad!  I have been looking forward to watching my husband hold his first child pretty much since we met.  It was a moment I did not want to miss.  (Why was he in the NICU?  He was big and healthy, but he had an apnea episode where he stopped breathing and they wanted to monitor him.  No one seemed to be extra concerned so we tried not to be as well.)  I just remember walking around the corner and seeing this HUGE baby boy with his dark hair lying there and thinking "I cannot believe he is ours".  He was all hooked up to monitors so at first we thought we weren't going to be able to hold him.  I was extra disappointed, but tried to pretend like it was okay.  We took a few pictures, our first as a family. When the nurse (Cindy) asked us if we wanted to hold him I almost hugged her.  I sat down on a chair and she handed me my son and my world changed forever.  I will never forget that moment.  I sat there staring into the face of this little boy and could not believe it was happening.  In the background I could hear the caseworker say to Ben, "this has been a long time coming, hasn't it" and the tears started to flow.  We have prayed for, worked for, cried for this little person for almost six years and here he was!  It was overwhelming and I never wanted to let him go.  After a few minutes I turned him over to Ben.  I watched him wipe away tears as he held his son.  We were instantly in love with this little man and just so grateful he was finally here.
















Any of you who know me well know that I love Twilight and I am not ashamed.  The movies also have the best soundtracks.  The most recent soundtrack for Breaking Dawn has a song on it called "A Thousand Years" by Christina Perri.  From the first time I heard this song the words fit the exact feelings I already had for this baby that was coming to us.  Meeting him for the first time the words of this song were running through my head.  You don't have to listen to the video, I did include the lyrics below, but I LOVE this song and it really is so fitting of my feelings.  I now call it "Benson's song".



A Thousand Years 

(Verse 1)
Heart beats fast
Colors and promises
How to be brave
How can I love when I'm afraid
To fall
But watching you stand alone
All of my doubt
Suddenly goes away somehow

One step closer

(Chorus)
I have died everyday
waiting for you
Darlin' don't be afraid
I have loved you for a
Thousand years
I'll love you for a
Thousand more

(Verse 2)
Time stands still
Beauty I know she is
I will be brave
I will not let anything 
Take away
What's standing in front of me
Every breath, 
Every hour has come to this

One step closer

(Chorus)
I have died everyday
Waiting for you
Darlin' don't be afraid
I have loved you for a
Thousand years
I'll love you for a 
Thousand more

And all along I believed
I would find you
Time has brought
Your heart to me
I have loved you for a 
Thousand years
I'll love you for a
Thousand more

One step closer
One step closer

(Chorus)
I have died everyday
Waiting for you
Darlin' don't be afraid,
I have loved you for a
Thousand years
I'll love you for a
Thousand more

And all along I believed
I would find you
Time has brought 
Your heart to me
I have loved you for a
Thousand years
I'll love you for a 
Thousand more

1 comment:

Jennica said...

So sweet! I love that song!!